A few months ago I saw a pie image on Twitter so creepy, and disturbing, that I actually questioned whether it was too terrifying to post as a video. Usually, Halloween-themed recipes have the opposite problem, as they are almost never actually scary, but that’s not an issue here. By the way, can someone get sued for giving people nightmares?
Anyway, I eventually traced the image back to what I assumed would be some sort of food blog, but it was actually someone’s Etsy shop, where they were selling inedible versions of this basic design. So, I wasn’t able to see how it was made, but did use their “face” as a rough guide, and despite being somewhat anatomically challenged, I thought this came out looking great. And by great, I mean terrible.
If you’re disturbed enough to make this, you can use our tourtière recipe for the crust and filling, which is exactly what I did here, except for whatever reason I added a touch of ketchup to the meat. Of course, this technique would work for topping any pie, including all your favorite fruit versions, and the next time cherries are in season, I may just have to give this one more try. Or not. We’ll see. In the meantime, if at all possible, please enjoy!
Many holiday main course recipes involve expensive ingredients, and/or time consuming, complicated techniques, not to mention the anxiety that comes along with worrying whether all that time and money will have been worth it. I’m looking at you, dry, overcooked beef wellington.
If you want to avoid all that, maybe consider making tourtière. This French-Canadian meat pie is hearty, satisfying, easy to make, visually impressive, relatively affordable, and since it’s best served at room temperature, doesn’t require any kind of precise timing.
You can also easily tailor this to your own tastes, since other than the ground meat and mashed potato, pretty much anything goes. Or, make it just like this. I’ve only had tourtière a handful of times, so I’m certainly no expert, but I thought this came out extremely well, and I wouldn’t change anything when I make it again.
Although, I may try it with some beef gravy, as a few of my Canadian friends have suggested. Some even suggest ketchup, which I did try on a cold slice, and not surprisingly it was delicious. But, no matter how you serve this tourtière, I really do hope you give it a try soon. Enjoy!
Ingredients for one 9-inch Tourtière:
For the crust:
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, sliced, frozen
7 tablespoons ice cold *water
2 teaspoons white distilled vinegar
*add a little more if dough isn’t pressing together
1 large russet potato, boiled in enough salted water to cover (reserve water)
1 tablespoon butter
4 cloves garlic, crushed
1 large onion, finely chopped
1/2 cup finely diced celery
1 pound ground pork
1 pound ground beef
1 cup potato water, plus more as needed
For the spice blend:
2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon dried sage
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1⁄2 teaspoonground ginger
1⁄4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground allspice
1/4 teaspoon ground mustard
1/8 teaspoon ground clove
pinch cayenne
For the egg wash:
1 large egg
1 tablespoon water
Please note: Once your filling has cooled, taste for salt, and adjust before filling the crust.
I can understand certain recipes being relatively unknown, but this buttermilk pie is not one of them. Not only is this easy to make, and beautiful to look at, it’s also bursting with the kind of bright, tangy flavor that no other custard-style pie can touch. Like I said in the video, this is sort of like a vanilla custard, meets lemon meringue pie, meets very light cheesecake. Except better.
I’ve never had much trouble finding buttermilk, even in regular, non-fancy grocery stores, but depending on where you live in the world, apparently that’s not the case. There are many “hacks” for making a substitute, usually using milk and lemon juice, or vinegar, and I’ll let you Google those at your leisure, but I’d be more inclined to try some yogurt, thinned out with some milk.
I think that would be closer to the tanginess of buttermilk, but as far as the recipe “working,” one cup of any type of dairy product should yield similar results. Once your pie is made, it can be served “as is,” or topped with seasonal fruit. I went with raspberries, mostly for the pictures, but if you were going to do this for the holidays, some persimmons, and/or pomegranate seeds would also be very nice. Regardless of how you serve it, I really do hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!
Ingredients for one pie:
Enough pie dough for a 9-inch pie dish (I used half a recipe of our butter crust dough)
For the filling:
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temp
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
3 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/8 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
zest from one lemon
juice from one lemon juice
1 cup buttermilk
- Prebake crust at 350 F. for 15-20 minutes, let cool, then fill and bake for another 45-55 minutes, or until the filling is golden and “set.”
There shouldn’t be a lot of stress involved in making this free-form strawberry tart, since once it’s topped with fresh berries, and thickly glazed, it will look like something from a Paris pastry shop. And, I did say, “look like,” not “taste like,” but that’s not our fault. They have better cream cheese.
If you have a tart pan, go ahead and use it, but going free-form is always kind of fun, and even though we’re going to handle the dough a bit more, that’s not a problem with our almost foolproof buttercrust pastry. Just be sure to build up enough around the outside before you crimp, so that your tart is deep enough to hold the filling.
I joked about this being so beautiful that nobody will care what it tastes like, but of course, that’s ridiculous. Do not attempt this unless you can find some perfectly ripe, sweet strawberries. And when you do, I really hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!
Ingredients for 6 portions:
1/2 of our buttercrust pastry dough recipe
1 pound fresh strawberries
For the sweet cheese mixture:
8 ounces cream cheese or *fromage blanc
2 tablespoons crème fraiche
2 tablespoons white sugar
1 large egg yolk
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon lemon zest, or to taste
For the glaze:
1/4 cup apricot jam (the clearer, the better), plus 2 teaspoons water, heated until brushable. Let cool a bit before applying.
*Note: my cream cheese was suspiciously thin, so your mixture will probably be thicker, and a little easier to work with.
- Bake tart shell at 375 F. for 20-25 minutes, until golden-brown, fill with cheese mixture, and finish baking for another 20 minutes, or until the pastry is browned, and the filling is set.
